Wit is just 1 t short of twit

Heh. Is it possible to become so mindless that you get hated for it? Lets just say I go so off topic and so irrelevant to my posts that it doesnt even make sense anymore. Would I face the judgement of hundred-strong crowds that would overrun my house and scream bloody murder for normality to ooze out of my pores? By the way, whoever coined the phrase 'scream bloody murder' really made some kickass term. Its a palindrome almost. When you scream, bloody is one of the words which my just emit from that mantlous mouth of yours, and when theres murder, the only time where there wouldnt be blood is if the cold blooded killer had a bad mishap with his toaster. That didnt really make sense did it. It wasnt supposed to. Anyhow, back to the topic. Could I go so off topic that even off topic is too far from it? Would A post with a title of off topicness be able to encompass whatever off topicness that would come out from it? Bleh I dont have much heart in posting this post, BUT, since i will always have an interest in comedy, retardation and anything vaguely amusing, I cant really hate my own banter can I. Sometimes i do regret what I post, but thats just when I post a really bad post. Like this. I mean, this is practically a filler for whats to come. Something to waste your time to benefit me. Heh. In the words of some famous guy: "Being able to Believe the unbelievable surely is believable isnt it."

You got mail (b****)

Heh. So since i decided that no one in their right mind would send fan mail to me, I have come to the conclusion that I should send mail to people, then put those on my blog. What a fantastic idea! It goes along the lines of "You wont give me money so ill give you money and become famous." Well actually no. If donald trump did that he would be so much the less rich, and wouldnt really be a celeb anymore. Someone with the business sense of a 3rd eye, he sure does have the fashion sense of a 3rd leg. No wait. Bad analogy. Im sorry. Anyway, on to the letters. Woot.

Letter 1:
Ok Jhon. Since your at bio now, and I think you would probably be suffering, I decided out of the kindness of my heart to send you good info on what to say on monday. Im sure you would be happy to note that i have many good things to say, plus im in a good mood. Considering I dont have any exams anymore. Unlike you. Ha. Oh no, someone just called you stupid. Help. This is problem. It might be jhon-depricating, or it might also be the truth. Now you cant handle the truth. Can you? Heh. Lang arts sure is fun. I just blogged an entire blog to you. Feel encouraged that I waste my recess time to type out this letter to you. Wo xi wang hui jin kuai de dao ni de lai xing. Now while I wallow in self-happiness, I shall continue on to state my points for our presentation.

Letter 2:
Well, ok you got me there. So I dont have a letter 2. Sue me. If you did you could prolly match donald trump and roll in cash, literally. I mean, with some shape like that he should be able to roll. Shouldnt he? Now, before you swipe my head and demand refund, this is not technically a blog post, so be expecting more a few minutes down the line. Heh. Being not at home sure got 3 times the funner.

Note the 3 3s in this blog post. And note the 1 3 in Friday the 13th? Well, they connect somehow. Somehow. In the words of some famous guy: "Letters consist of lets and ers. So let ers now end this conversation." If you didnt get that, try switching on punny mode and reread that.

Isolation Violation

Hmm. Today felt depressingly bad. Somewhat like a jail cell. Mpmh. With the ability to go out (I cant be too sure about this), and yet this mindset of "I should be studying" assaulting my already beaten brain, I felt pretty bad today. Yeh. But enough rambling, more banter. So. with only my brother to talk to (this doesnt really count) , and people on msn, (ian / clareng / the bunch of people who shld be studying like me but arent.), the day passed pretty slowly, and I was beginning to wonder whether holidays before the exams was such a good idea. Anyhow, I resorted to going down over and over again to feed the fish (the fish seem be twice their original size alreay. Think 5 meals a day.), and stoning around the house, trying to not use the com so I would feel less guilty. Heh. Anyhow, I had to make lunch for us this fateful day. The menu for the day consisted of:

Appetizer:
Slightly toasted and crisp slices of thin air. The aroma so refreshing and the taste so fulfilling, its amazing how an average person takes this for granted.

Main Course:
An assortment of sauces, ranging from BBQ to BBQ to 1 Year stale mustard to honey to terriyaki source will tantalise your tastebuds as you start off on your expedition a food haven. Garnished with golden yet soft and half-cooked fries with last night's chicken on the side.

Dessert:
Not to be confused with desert, dessert consists of a palatable plate, as well as a frosty mug of lemon juice. Fresh from the carton. Not so fresh from some california plantation thing.

Enjoy your meal.


Anyhow, I managed to get through that meal with only one stomachache that night, probably due to the half cooked fries... (Hey the packet DID say DONT OVERCOOK THE FRIES didnt it?) Anyhow, after such delectable delights, my day only had one way to go by. Improve? Nah. Deprove, Yeh. So basically stuff went EVEN MORE downhill from there, as I begin to slack even more, and fail to study much properly. However, I must say that I managed to get some of my Chinese done. Some.

A day of isolation in my very own home with no outsiders to talk to gave me some sort of depression, and yet, with depression comes enlightenment. So today I have learnt more truths about life. The main takeaway I got is that I should never cook again, until next time that is. Hmm. In the words of some famous guy: "The reason why they're called french fries is cos the french made it." (You DO realise thats a bad thing right? Go ask clarence)